At least once a week, someone tells me about the new challenge they are undertaking to lose weight or get healthier. They are going to stop eating anything white, or they’re going to cut out all carbs, or exercise every single day at their new gym.
I saw a 30-day “get skinny” challenge online that listed about twenty-five things to avoid: no sugar, no alcohol, no red meat, no tropical fruits, no fast food, no fried food, and of course, no excuses. Then followed the comments of people who had accepted the challenge, and said, “this is what I need to finally get myself in gear!”
And I couldn’t help but ask, in gear for what? Never one to shy away from a challenge, I love and appreciate the thrill that comes from achieving something difficult, even if that is its own reward. I get that. Doing the difficult thing just to say you did it is a legitimate source of confidence and accomplishment. But when the goal is to get healthier, I find that success is much more accessible when we make things pretty easy.
First, let me define what I mean by success. When the goal is to lose weight and get healthier, I declare success when my client has reached a healthy weight, is able to maintain it through holidays and travel and tailgate season, and feels at ease with their ability to stay there physically and emotionally. Most of the time, when people drill down to what they want from their healthy goals, it is the ability to get to a good place and stay there.
That’s not the kind of thing that happens in thirty days, and it surely doesn’t happen in a state of survival conditions. It just doesn’t. I can’t say that you won’t feel triumphant and accomplished at the end of your month of no fun, but I can almost guarantee that you won’t be healthier or at ease with your ability to stay at the weight you’ve dieted down to.
To succeed and thrive, we need to step out of survival mode and into a safe zone. I encourage you to simply ask what would make it easier to do the things that will lead to weight loss and a healthier body.
For the sake of simplicity, let’s use the most common methods for healthy living as examples: eating healthfully, exercising, managing stress, and getting enough sleep. Instead of asking what should be removed from your diet, consider asking, “what would make it easier for me to eat healthier this week?”
Instead of signing up for the most rigorous workout in town and jolting your body into boot camp, ask, “what would make it easier to get more exercise, the good kind that really gets my heart pumping?”
What would make it easier to find time for meditation or relaxation in your day? What would make it easier for you to get to bed earlier?
It’s a bit of a trick question. Yes, it would be easier if we didn’t have to do anything, or if wine didn’t have calories, or if we had personal chefs and could quit our jobs so we had complete control of our time. Ha ha, yes, I know. But for real. In your real life, what would make it more realistic that you’re going to do these things?
Life is already hard enough, and there are plenty of opportunities to challenge your body and mind every day. And, challenge is good for us and I love a good kick in the pants to work a little harder and level up. But if you have been trying to convince yourself that you just need to work harder and try harder to make changes in your health, then I invite you to instead ask, “what would make it easier?”